Travels with Mary Jane and Friends

In the old days of travel, before tighter airport security, I traveled to Hong Kong with friends who very discreetly carried marijuana in their cigarette packs; needless to say, it went undetected (or I’d be writing this article from a Chinese prison somewhere…guilty by association!). Fast forward to this new age of increased airport security, where trying to bring some “recreational” fun on board with you is a little trickier. Here are a few of our favorite “nice try” stories that might make you think again (or not!).

1) A British woman attempting to get through Australian Customs in Sydney was arrested when 260 grams of heroin was discovered in her vagina....doesn’t it make you wonder who made THAT discovery? (Sep. 26, 2007)

2) A Suriname women was arrested in Amsterdam, Netherlands when Customs officials noticed her leg cast was a little too thick. X-rays revealed no fractures but drugs (3.3 lbs of cocaine, to be more specific). Damn those sniffer dogs!! Next time maybe she should throw a few dog treats in there, too. (May 11, 2007)

3) Months before he was arrested on dog fighting charges, Michael Vick apparently didn’t think trying to carry a 20 oz. bottle of water through security in Miami (when the limit is 3 oz.) would raise suspicion. That big rascal really didn’t want to surrender the bottle to security and who could blame him…turns out that bottle had a hidden compartment. And, if it looks like weed and smells like weed, chances are....well, you know. Do you think being tackled too much clouded his judgement? (Jan. 18, 2007)

4) Say it isn’t so! Two men boarded an Orlando to San Juan flight carrying 14 guns and 8 pounds of marijuana. How did they get through security screening? They worked for one of the airlines and used their employee badges to bypass security. Oh, yes, by the way they were arrested, leaving 2 job vacancies at Comair…….any takers? (3/19/07)

5) A man traveling from Jamaica to Barbados was sentenced to 5 years in prison after authorities found 17 packages of marijuana in his luggage. He could have paid a fine to avoid the sentence, but declined. Maybe the authorities could have cut him some slack and let him sell a package or two to raise funds? (Nov. 14, 2003)

Until next time, folks, bon voyage